Frames of Happiness: Sharing is Giving – Giving is Receiving

If you work for the good instead of working for your own success, it means you’re an alien – or at least an X-men.

Sup mate! Vincent here.

It is quite a common thing to feel guilty about doing things for ourselves in prior to helping others most of the time. Peculiarly when we’re doing good and people around us aren’t. But it’s even more painful when we suck at trying to improve our own situation, devoting the major part of our time struggling with perpetual wonderings such as « what would make me happier? » and more importantly « what would make me happy RIGHT NOW? ».

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Ok here’s the trap: I want my hopes raised up, I want to feel good so I need to work on myself and only myself. Other people can wait.

What about nope? If you think about it, selfish behaviors can not be the solution and there is no reason why you should receive something good ex nihilo if you don’t broadcast something good, from you, at first.

Well my point is that we truly need to find the right balance between self-development and these times where we choose to save the galaxy. And I have the feeling that the essence of self-development itself has common borders with looking after each others.

In fact, here’s one pretty cool life hack some caring souls did manage to find with time and practice: helping people genuinely helps yourself.

“No one has ever become poor by giving.” ― Anne Frank

There are so many men and women here on planet Earth who did choose to be full-time helpers. Your local cop is one of them, Jessica who stopped her marketing course to join a humanitarian aid organisation is also one of them, and so are firefighters rushing into burning buildings or even military forces, incumbents of the vision of their homeland.

Yo, really. Why would you do that? Giving up on your own projects to dedicate your whole life taking care, saving, protecting or helping people?

Well guess what, I bet these guys are happier than you and me. Because having such a hard time making other people’s life better, reaching out to needy folks makes you feel useful and alive. That is quite a simple thing but just seeing a smile or tears of joy plays an enhancer role strengthening such behaviors.

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Now the good news is that you don’t have to become subservient nor consecrate 100% of your time being Captain Rescuer, just like these courageous guys do, to be useful and, on top of that, cheerful. Most of the time helping people can be done on a daily basis by just becoming a more responsive person. I’m not talking about forced positivity (which is an exhausting process + probably not efficient in the long run) but more like being able to provide and experience quality talks with your relatives in the first place for example. You may want to take the opportunity to be the game changer for someone else’s mood and do the uplift. Sometimes it means just being able to listen without judging.

“Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value.” ― Albert Einstein

Adding value to the world is creating value for ourselves. Just by considering this basic fact, that it’s much easier to find help when people know you’d be likely to do the same, the immediate benefit is insane. Of course there will always be grumpy beasts trying to leech your motivation and deplete your attempts at being grateful or even just pro active in the research of healthy habits. But in the end if you keep doing the good around you, there are great chances that it would all be given back if needed. Have you ever heard of karma? What works with bad stuff also does with good stuff.

« Psychologically speaking, pretty much everything we see happening at a social level in the world will point back to things happening within us. What better way to add value to the world than changing ourselves for the better? » ― Rajesh Kadam

High five mate!

Stay resilient.

  • Uplifting song of the week: KADINJA – Episteme
  • Yo! I’m also accepting requests & suggestions on Twitter! Did you like this article? What should I write on next? Send your tweets to @haarasnc with hashtag #StayResilient
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2 thoughts on “Frames of Happiness: Sharing is Giving – Giving is Receiving

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